Good enough

I am not sure when I became so damn pessimistic, at this point I don't really care. My Monday:
Wake up at 6am, pee, shower, dress myself.
Get kids up at 6:30 & get 4 kids dressed, fed breakfast, and ready for the day.
Start a load of laundry, empty the dishwasher.
Check work, home, and school emails; check calendar for "To do list."
Double check book bags for needed signatures and homework.
8:10am Take 2 kids to school, come home, swap laundry, clean up kitchen.
Change a diaper, play with 2 kids while prepping for tonight's dinner and folding clothes.
Do some homework, feel guilty about not spending enough time with kids while I turn on the stupid television so I can get some work done.
11am Fix lunch and feed 2 kids.
Change a diaper.
12:45pm Drop one kid off at the sitter and take another to school.
1:10pm Go to school.
7pm Come home from school; change a diaper and swap the laundry again.
Talk to husband& eat dinner.
Check kids' homework.
7:30pm Bathe the girls and the baby get them ready for bed.
8pm Say prayers with kids and put them to bed.
Clean the kitchen and finish laundry.
Study and do homework.
11pm Go to bed
3am-ish Wake up to husband coming home from work and talk for about 15 minutes.
5:30am Wake up for another day...school starts at 6:50am on Tuesday.

Each and every weekday is pretty similar to this one...and I am working nearly EVERY weeked 8 to 12 hours each day.

Unfortunately I am NOT able to keep everyone up with a friggin play by play no matter how hard I try. Yes, I made my bed, I am happy to lie in it...what I do not need is anyone else's passing of judgement on me and how I chose to get through MY life with MY children. A friend once told me this, "A lot goes on behind closed doors, until you know everything that happens there you have no room to judge." AMEN, brother Lucas!

So, for the millionth time...I AM TRYING! If you don't like my effort then GET LOST!